Markoff owns Redhots and Fries, a hot dog joint in the Chicago suburb of Glenview. In addition to the usual fare (and not-so-usual fare, such as smoked alligator-and-pork sausages and buffalo bratwurst) Markoff also sells an unusual (and unsettling) seasonal delicacy -- reindeer franks.

Yup – reindeer wieners. Markoff said he first tasted reindeer hot dogs on a trip to Alaska several years ago. Not to put too fine a point on it, but isn’t the wacky tobacky legal in Alaska? I’m not implying that Markoff may have been hitting the glaucoma medicine a little too hard, but anything that would give you visions of sugar plums would probably also give you a case of munchies so intense that even a Donder and Dasher dog would hit the spot.

Markoff’s Alaskan-made reindeer dogs also contain a little beef and pork. This is because reindeer meat is so lean and dry. Plus, not surprisingly, it tastes like reindeer. The dogs are served with grilled onions and mustard, and they cost eight dollars. Eight dollars … eight tiny reindeer? Is this ironic, or is Markoff just being trying to be funny?

The idea of reindeer hot dogs really puts the damper on my holiday spirit. It’s bad enough that the Christmas decorations go up right around Thanksgiving; if you didn’t know better you’d think Santa was one of the Pilgrims, and that his sleigh was towed by turkeys. And now, someone’s selling hot dogs made from reindeer.

Could have been worse, I guess – Markoff could have dubbed the new hot dog, “Rudolph the Reindeer Redhot.”